Audible Confessions of a Slacker Wife By Muffy Mead-Ferro – Albawater.co

I really liked this book but I guess you figured that out from my stars It was a breath of fresh air in this uber child proof, safe world we live in Her basic premise is that if we follow the current trend we do too much for our children or shield them from all pain we don t teach them to be independent or understand how natural consequences work This went along very well with my belief in love and logic It may be shocking to some because she lets her kids fall down and she lets them bo I really liked this book but I guess you figured that out from my stars It was a breath of fresh air in this uber child proof, safe world we live in Her basic premise is that if we follow the current trend we do too much for our children or shield them from all pain we don t teach them to be independent or understand how natural consequences work This went along very well with my belief in love and logic It may be shocking to some because she lets her kids fall down and she lets them bonk their heads, but if there s serious danger she interferes As a teacher I SO believe that parents do too much for their children, try to shield them from every hurt and disappointment They are always in my classroom on on the telephone telling me how an A will ruin their child s life I particularly liked the part about too many toys and toys that do too much Have you ever noticed, though, that when a toy does , the kid playing with it usually does less Wow, this violin plays music all by itself Hey, this book reads the words for me Gosh, this paper magically doesn t let you color outside the lines I really wonder if this is good It might be unthinkably bad It might be turning our children into dimwits, dolts, and dullards Not geniuses I often thought to myself, If I really want to compete with these guys, I need a wife, begins Muffy Mead Ferro in this ode to the women everywhere who are trying to take care of husbands, children, houses, jobs, bosses, clients, customers and, oh yes, themselves In lieu of that much needed wife of her own, Mead Ferro finds solace, sanity, and even success by embracing her famous tendency toward slackerdom Full of personal anecdotes and real wife wisdom, her latest Confessions offers precious comic relief and an invitation for wives everywhere to join the ranks A slacker wife has the wisdom to accept the following that a little dirt on her kitchen floor doesn t hurt anyone, that wrinkles on her husband s shirt and on her face are perfectly natural and not worth worrying about, that party guests can be just as happy with a bowl of chips as an elaborate salmon mousse, and that over scheduled equals under happy Above all, a slacker wife lets herself have fun being a wife She has girls weekends, orders take out, and takes leisurely walks And as a result, she, her husband, and her family are happier and healthier even with a dirty kitchen floor and a wrinkled shirt Probably should rate this 3.5 stars The first 3 4s of the book really resonated with meshe lost me a little in a couple later chapters I really liked her has anyone seen my instinct and there goes Harvard chapters I also like to parent with common sense instead of focusing all my available energy and resources on creating the super genius child I d rather raise a well rounded child who has social skills so they are likable as well as smart, talented, funny or whatever their thing t Probably should rate this 3.5 stars The first 3 4s of the book really resonated with meshe lost me a little in a couple later chapters I really liked her has anyone seen my instinct and there goes Harvard chapters I also like to parent with common sense instead of focusing all my available energy and resources on creating the super genius child I d rather raise a well rounded child who has social skills so they are likable as well as smart, talented, funny or whatever their thing turns out to be I don t feel the need to have my children be the very best at every single thing life has to offer ie the endless parade of extra curricular activities I just want them to enjoy doing what they choose to do BlasphemyI know Ugh what a terrible book I recently joined a book group that reads books devoted to parenting issues The leader of the group thought that this book would be a great place to start because it is short and it is supposed to be funny Well, she at least got the short part right Other than that, this book is nothing but a self indulgent, inconsistent, disastrous mess.First, the author is so proud over how she buys her kids nothing, takes them nowhere and devotes no time to their education Hey, Ugh what a terrible book I recently joined a book group that reads books devoted to parenting issues The leader of the group thought that this book would be a great place to start because it is short and it is supposed to be funny Well, she at least got the short part right Other than that, this book is nothing but a self indulgent, inconsistent, disastrous mess.First, the author is so proud over how she buys her kids nothing, takes them nowhere and devotes no time to their education Hey, she says, kids have too many things, which makes them unappreciative Hey, she says, I am not a shuttle service and kids don t need to be kept busy with scheduled activities Hey, she says, I don t care where my kids go to school, or if they can read by 12, they ll figure it out Leave the kids alone and let them find their way Am I exaggerating here No Does the author have some valid points Sure My issue is that she takes a common sense notion and then presents an extreme position of how she would handle it.For example, the author says that if you see your kid standing on the seat of her tricycle, let her go If she falls on her head, so be it That ll teach her and she ll learn not to do it again However, don t let your kid run into traffic, because that would be crazy and irresponsible of you as a parent Maybe it s me but I have difficulty distinguishing between these scenarios I would feel compelled to protect my child in both situations, whereas the author is able to sit back in the first instance and act in the second To me, either scenario can end up a child landing head first into the pavement, so I am struggling to see the difference between the two.Another example is letting your kid show up for her school picture with a haircut that the kid gave herself over the weekend The author advises to make sure that your child doesn t see you laughing at her and to not doing anything to fix it Let her go and take her school photo, looking like a poodle Yes, she said looking like a poodle That ll teach your kid to cut her hair I ll note that there is no mention of how a 5 year had scissors sharp enough for cutting hair in the first place, but then again, using adult scissors near the eye, ear and head area is different from running in traffic A kid needs to learn that the world is dangerous.There are twopoints that I want to mention to further dissuade anyone from reading this book One is that get this the slacker mom, who is all chill and not worried about much as it relates to her children, freaks out and hits her kids from time to time to keep them under control In one scene, she describes yelling and swinging wildly at her kids in the backseat while she is driving She also states how she would advocate spanking, but you know, some parents can take these things too far The author then further states that after awhile she just needed to threaten to hit her children, because they understand that there are consequences to their actions There is this whole I need to be me and have a career discussion that I will skip over as nothing but further self rationalization of the author not being present for her children, which I could go on and on about, but I ve said enough already and I want to mention onething about the book.The last chapter is a diatribe against parenting books and websites, which is the biggest hypocrisy of all in which the author engages Muffy, just because you give a book a title that has Confessions in it, doesn t make it less of a parenting advice book than the others that you despise so much At this point, I had to pour myself a scotch to numb the pain that I felt when trying to finish this book last night.All in all, I live in a judgment free parenting zone unless there is a safety issue What works for me may not work for you and that s ok There s no one sure path when it comes to parenting, because kids are unique and react differently to various parenting styles Much of parenting is rooted in our own familial values that influence how we want to handle things with our children Education is incredibly important to me, and it is something that I focus on very much with my child For other parents, it might be art or music, or sports, or farming or fishing As long as our children are healthy, happy and SAFE, there is no one size fits all solution, and we should support each other as parents and give each other the benefit of the doubt that we are trying to do what we think is best for our kids After reading this book, however, I am having trouble putting Muffy in this category I would not recommend this book to anyone to read SKIP IT I enjoy her books I ll admit I liked Confessions of a Slacker Mom a bit better I could relate better to it Since I m not working full time and trying to be a wife and mother I needed this book a little less What I do like about her books, aside from the fact they make me laugh, is that she basically gives us permission to let some things go So often as wives and mothers we feel like we ve failed if we don t do everything Our children should be in dance and soccer and music and school Our I enjoy her books I ll admit I liked Confessions of a Slacker Mom a bit better I could relate better to it Since I m not working full time and trying to be a wife and mother I needed this book a little less What I do like about her books, aside from the fact they make me laugh, is that she basically gives us permission to let some things go So often as wives and mothers we feel like we ve failed if we don t do everything Our children should be in dance and soccer and music and school Our houses should be spotless, we should be gorgeous, always She says it s ok to not do everything Everything isn t what s best for you or your family It s ok if I don t mop my floors daily and if my children are only involved in one activity I can have friends over without first cleaning every inch of my house including the areas they ll never see and without preparing some elaborate meal Sometimes it s nice to have someone remind me that less doesn t mean I ve failed It s like they teach us in church we should be focusing our energies on the best things not wasting it on too many good things What begins as a funny tribute to the let your kid cry it out method of parenthood slowly evolves into the author s puffed up version of patting herself on the back while the reader is a hostage eyewitness You get the feeling that you are way too neurotic about your child s safety and well being and Muffy Whats Her Face is a cooler mom than you Came away feeling bad about my child rearing techniques caring, worrying, watching them sleep and making sure they are safe 24 7, ect, wanting to put What begins as a funny tribute to the let your kid cry it out method of parenthood slowly evolves into the author s puffed up version of patting herself on the back while the reader is a hostage eyewitness You get the feeling that you are way too neurotic about your child s safety and well being and Muffy Whats Her Face is a cooler mom than you Came away feeling bad about my child rearing techniques caring, worrying, watching them sleep and making sure they are safe 24 7, ect, wanting to put them in a plastic bubble, ect Wait, maybe I am too neurotic Well, I don t need Muffy pointing that out, thank you very much.We all love our kids differently, right And each mom is as unique as her grimy fingerprints So be it Cheers to motherhood The only reason this book got 2 stars is because I did agree with her on the facts that kids have to get dirty and hurt sometimes And also the fact that loading too many activities on them can be detrimental I d rather have my kid be proud of doing very well at one sport activity than being mediocre at a dozen because he can t focus all his energy into one I do not agree with muchof what she was saying And the way she writes is plain annoying with her oh so superior voice Apparently The only reason this book got 2 stars is because I did agree with her on the facts that kids have to get dirty and hurt sometimes And also the fact that loading too many activities on them can be detrimental I d rather have my kid be proud of doing very well at one sport activity than being mediocre at a dozen because he can t focus all his energy into one I do not agree with muchof what she was saying And the way she writes is plain annoying with her oh so superior voice Apparently nobody raised off a farm could possibly understand the concept of hard work or struggling She obviously gets off on thinking she s superior to everyone, especially if they bring toys for their kids to play with for the weekend, but she has no problem mooching those same toys that she scorns off the other parents Her theory is that children with a lot of toys get bored very easily and don t care about whether or not they break them That is only true on the way they re raised My son has plenty of toys but he knows that if they get broken because he s careless with them he is not getting new ones And he also knows the phrase I m bored will only get him into his room cleaning it I ve found that s a sure fire way of avoiding boredom whining I will agree with her about the fact that toys have become muchevolved than they were, sometimes in bad ways, sometimes good I don t usually buy the toys that require no imagination I want my son to develop that as much as any other attribute of his And can she seriously say that neither her or her husband will be cheering on their kids from the sidelines of their chosen sport How can that be looked on as even remotely good Why should it be a bad thing that they play to get praise from their parents As long as the parents aren t forcefully demanding that their child play that particular sport stage parents then I see absolutely nothing wrong with letting your child know that they are there and supporting them and proud of them I also would like to know how she can even call herself a slacker mom when she uses a nanny for crying out loud Fine if you work, there are many mothers that do, whether because they have to or because they like to I ve found that most of the parents that I know that have to work really wish they didn t have to so they can spendtime with their kids Also her little slam on the nannies was pretty low How does she kow that their life s dream is to take care of other people s kids Maybe her kids will respect her for working hard And then again maybe they ll resent the fact that they were raised by their nanny instead of their parent She s also pretty hypocritical In one sentence she totally out of context so I m assuming she just threw it in there to show us all what a hard worker she is and what occupation she is says that she loves her 60 hour a week job as an advertiser then in the very next sentence outlines the evils of advertising If it disturbs her that much why doesn t she find a different job And I don t see how a kid having their own room can be terrible for them Everybody needs their privacy once in a while I would not recommend this book to anyone because most of the stuff that she does get right is mostly common sense stuff I agree with the less thingsimagination aspects of this book, but I think I would have repackaged the book Mead Ferro isn t a slacker that chiding title really shouldn t be applied here She paints herself as someone who is passionate about and good at her job, which is absolutely fine and lovely In many ways, I envy that, as my career doesn t involve money really I haven t seen an original book of poetry on the bestseller lists Just Heaney s translation of Beowulf a while back.I also I agree with the less thingsimagination aspects of this book, but I think I would have repackaged the book Mead Ferro isn t a slacker that chiding title really shouldn t be applied here She paints herself as someone who is passionate about and good at her job, which is absolutely fine and lovely In many ways, I envy that, as my career doesn t involve money really I haven t seen an original book of poetry on the bestseller lists Just Heaney s translation of Beowulf a while back.I also don t think Mead Ferro quite understands the point of scrapbooking Or at least my interpretation of the activity, which I suppose I do, in some senses, with my motherhood blog For me, keeping up with photos and reflections is much less about Maya andabout the process of becoming a mother and creating a space for memories I have a faulty brain and most things leak out Now, I see the world through an internet feed This isn t really true I keep a paper journal, I print photographs, I reflect on things with my husband, my recent manuscript is about this experience And all of these things belong to me Maya can have access to whatever, but it s not for her It s not a celebration of the first bite because she accomplished something though, hooray, she will do it and soon but because these are warm moments where everything is quiet and good and she doesn t have the ability to slam the door.I know Mead Ferro meant to be funny and clever and for us to zip through merrily, but the tone didn t quite pull over The Funny I d rather check out Dooce or Finslippy s versions of events At least I could chuckle while rolling my eyes I wanted to like this Ah well.My favorite moment was the descriptions of the holiday hauls the amused observation of how we will buy books that read to our children, plastic instruments that play a song with a button push, etc Toys that play with themselves, in other words, no interaction required And she confessed toys of this ilk often entered one door of the house and out the back This isn t quite the solution I d hope for I feel for the earnestness of the gift giver who wants the latest thing for a loved baby So far so good though my closest friends and family know my attitude towards this and I think we ve gotbalance some plastic, some pink, but not such an overload as to sink the ship Mead Ferro is certainly calling for a quiet riot in the image of wifery In her book she calls out the standards that we, as women, have set for ourselves, and boldly asks WHY everything needs to be perfect She s quick to point out that it s not necessarily all men s fault that wives have become caught up and exhausted in the pursuit of perfection The author wants women to be independant from the traditional role of wife and wants us to get out there and use our brains and pursue what Mead Ferro is certainly calling for a quiet riot in the image of wifery In her book she calls out the standards that we, as women, have set for ourselves, and boldly asks WHY everything needs to be perfect She s quick to point out that it s not necessarily all men s fault that wives have become caught up and exhausted in the pursuit of perfection The author wants women to be independant from the traditional role of wife and wants us to get out there and use our brains and pursue what makes us happy outside the lives of our husband, and in her case, her children.As a diet coke feminist, I agree with Mead Ferro s ideals almost completely, and appreciate that she sees that women are to shoulder some of the blame for setting our own standards completely outside what is possible However, I feel like the author draws too many of her examples of the ideal wife from her mother While I m sure the author s mother was a great person and sounds like an excellent example, I feltandthat the author thought her mother was the only kind of woman one should be, and that just didn t sit well with me This book walks a fine line between helpful advice and preachy and at times the author tends to stumble onto the pulpit a little hard I like it when I feel like someone is being helpful, I do not like it when I feel like someone is telling me what I should do.What s very misleading about the front few pages of this book is that the reviews all say that it s hilarious I felt like the author had a lot of good things to say, but I felt like there really wasn t anything comedic about the book at all You want hilarious Read Laurie Notaro not Muffy Mead Ferro You want good ideas and a fresh feminist perspective, then this author might beup your alley I m giving this book a 5 10 because it wasn t what I expected While I felt the author had a lot of good things to say about wifery in general, I was looking for something a littlelight and funny, and it s not what I got here Diet Coke Feminist Women who believein the enhancement of women s rights but do not believe that men are the devil and are the ONLY reason that sexism exsists I m not saying they aren t a reason, but I don t think they shoulder all the blame It s Feminism Lite I read Confessions of a Slacker Wife, Muffy s second book, first, and LOVED it So I expected to LOVE this book, too, but I didn t, and I ll tell you the main reasons why.First, I m a slacker and I have no qualms about that I ve known I m a slacker my whole life and the fact that this attribute spills over into my family life is no surprise Part of my slacker ness is an overwhelming I just don t really care attitude coupled with a Do whatever you want, that s great, attitude Like a tolera I read Confessions of a Slacker Wife, Muffy s second book, first, and LOVED it So I expected to LOVE this book, too, but I didn t, and I ll tell you the main reasons why.First, I m a slacker and I have no qualms about that I ve known I m a slacker my whole life and the fact that this attribute spills over into my family life is no surprise Part of my slacker ness is an overwhelming I just don t really care attitude coupled with a Do whatever you want, that s great, attitude Like a tolerant whatever ness.So Muffy s Slacker Mom book came across as overbearing While Slacker Wife let me be however I wanted within the slacker category, Slacker Mom made me feel like I wasn t even being the right kind of slacker and so I can t make any grade Clearly, I m not super Mom, but I can t even be a slacker Mom because I dig scrapbooking Suck.True story about her anti scrapbooking chapter I just so happen to be related to Lisa Bearnson, founding editor of Creating Keepsakes magazine, which made scrapbooking HUGE Part of the chapter talks about her CKU s that she holds I happened to be with Lisa last week when I was reading Slacker Mom I read the relevant parts out loud to her and we got a good laugh about it.Overall, I liked the book But Slacker Wife didn t make me feel so bad about being insufficient, and I d recommend it any day over Slacker Mom